List 012: My favourite Facebook status updates

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Status messages on FB that made me snigger, snort, or smile. Or do all of the above at the same time.

Jade Bonus having self-congratuatory ‘you got your tax shit together’ beer

Jade Bonus now I have to clean my room after ‘where the fuck did I put my group certificate’ search 2010

Brian Tenorio I think I look good today. Sending out pogi vibes…

Lawrence Ypil oh, inconceivable , unchartable time that lies between anticipation and retrospect!

Lawrence Ypil just found out that the 25 centavo coin is magnetic, but the 5 peso coin isn’t. As to the overall significance of that observations? Ewan.

Cate Furey our little human is now one month old! and we haven’t broken him. yay!

Claire Atteia wants a flamingo.

Stephanie Misa If the weather keeps going the way it has, I’m seriously setting up a kiddie pool in my living room.

Gayatri Gitana will never tame the senses because they are intrinsically good!

Gayatri Gitana When we rethink what we think we already know, that is the beginning of knowledge and wisdom. – Ambeth Ocampo

Gayatri Gitana VUVUZELAS! Sounds so bakla! It could be a vulgar word to mean a volcanic blow job LOL

Paul Catiang
Dear Client, it’s hard to take you seriously when you use Comic Sans. Love, Paul

David S Liu
RT @DizzyDeep: RT @oldspice “Hello Australia. Look at your Parliament, now back at me. Sadly, it isn’t me, but it is hung like me.”

Alwynn Javier
(My Ms U Moment) Congratulations, Maria Venus Raj! I expected you to just end our semis drought, but you exceeded that and reached the Top 5! Tigilan na ang mga nega sa Q&A! True that she could have done better, but we all saw that she did her very best despite her limitations in rhetoric. She gave us a much-needed shining moment. Higit sa lahat, ang ganda niya. Masayang-masaya na ako dun, na ANG GANDA niya. :)

Harvey Ong
‎”I can’t believe I finished it all in one sitting” can apply to-
a. Two large bags of potato chips.
b. A complex logo and drawing.
c. One episode of ‘Sex and the City’.

J.D. Yap thinks “We are the World” is the most schizophrenic song to sing in a Karaoke…

Jade Bonus
slow internet makes baby jesus cry

Jade Bonus
tip#18: don’t put photos of your penis on your profile; wait until we are dating before you grossly disappoint us.

Bronwyn Meyrick
Sometimes i want to copy someone’s status, word for word, and see if they notice.

Eileen Tupaz
is profoundly grateful for all of God’s creatures: they make for an excellent larder.

Eileen Tupaz
thinks a fridge with seven bottles of wine and absolutely nothing to eat is a subtle indicator of misjudged priorities.

Adam Atteia feels manly after buying his first power tool.

Dominic Vicuna Sticks and stones may break my bones but chains and whips excite me…

Joanna Sapwell Davies Felix says to his best friend Isaac, “do you want to be a rudie nudie with me?” Isaac looks horrified and says “no” – it is the middle of winter Felix!


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